Enough time had passed and I knew my anger had faded. I could only hope my band mates hadn’t killed each other while I was gone, cause that would put a serious damper on our upcoming performance. I opened the door to hear the promising sounds of classic guitar riffs.
“Sounds good Saviris,” I complemented.
“Yeah, well, someone says I need to practice more,” said Saviris still with a tone of depression in her voice.
“You know I didn’t say that to hurt you?” I asked just to be sure.
“I know,” she said with a sigh. “You’re right, I do need practice.”
“Well you do sound good,” I added kindly.
“Thank you,” said Saviris. “Kelsi was thinking about it all wrong. You and me switching instruments wouldn’t solve anything. I’d have the same problems on the bass that I’m having on the guitar now, plus I’d never take the bass away from you, not when you play as good as you do, and knowing you love it that much. Like you said, I just need to practice.”
“Well I’m glad to see you having such a positive attitude, we’re going to need that this Saturday,” I told her.
“Why, what’s Saturday?” she asked.
“I’ll tell you all together,” I explained. “Are Ayashi and Kelsi around?”
“Yeah they’re both sequestered in their rooms,” answered Saviris.
“Hey Ayashi, Kelsi,” I called from the living room. “I got news.”
“Good news I hope,” said Ayashi who came out of her room first.
“Like finding us a new guitarist” added Kelsi, who still had just as sour an attitude as ever.
“No I got us a gig. A private party at Charles Pub, and the guy hosting the party specifically asked for us to play.”
“Well that’s a bit flattering,” said Ayashi. “We needed a good pick me up after this morning.
“But that’s not the only thing,” I said. “Since this is a private party they’re going
to pay us twice the normal rate to play it,” I explained.
“Sounds a bit like selling out,” responded Kelsi.
“Being able to pay the rent in not selling out,” Ayashi replied. “Sounds good to me, and all we have to do is play Charles Pub like we’d play any other gig?”
“Pretty much,” I said reassuringly. “But seeing as the customer is going all out for this party we should try to do the same and play something new.”
“Makes sense to me,” added Saviris.
“We have three days to practice a new set list,” said Ayashi. “So lets get to it.”
“Yeah,
sure,” said Kelsi, who then added half heartedly, “Go team Valefor.
So we practiced, for three straight days we worked on new material, tightened up some weak spots in our old sets and in general just practiced our collective asses off, and after those three days the night of the private party had come, time to see if the loss of our back ends was worth it.
We got to the pub a little before eight like any other gig, and even though it was the same old pub she looked a little different that night. First off was a big ass banner with balloons flanking either side reading “Congrats Jeff,” the guest of honor at this little shindig I suppose? Second were the long tables with platters of food ready to be served buffet style. Third would be the two of the people setting up the buffet.
“Since when do you girls work here?” I asked Alyssa and Megan, both wearing the attire of a Charles Pub waitress.
“We don’t,” Alyssa began to explain. “We’re just helping out for tonight.”
“Extra help for the big party,” added Megan. “It was Jim’s Idea.”
“Well,” I started. “You two may not be on the guest list, but he did say he’d find some way of getting you two in.”
“I’m a man of my word,” added Jim as he entered from the side carrying a tray of barbeque ribs. “Glad to see you came with the girls this time, are things better now?”
“Nothing we can’t work through,” I told Jim, trying to put as positive a spin I could on our bands current situation. “Every band goes through times like this.”
“Yeah
you’re right about that,” replied Jim as he looked towards the stage
and saw the girls setting up without me, Kelsi looking particularly
annoyed as she waited for her bass drum, which I was carrying in one
hand, the bag of pick up mikes in the other, and of course my bass strapped
to my back. “Suppose none of them want to talk with old Jim,” he
said remorsefully, his spirits then picked up and he told me, “Well
remember what we talked about. Have a good show.”
I made my way over to the stage and hopped up to where Kelsi was setting up the drums she currently had. I looked around and saw my fellow band mates and couldn’t help but think I was getting a bit of an evil eye.
“Sorry, friends of mine over there,” I explained as I opened up the bass drum case. “Just wanted to say hi.”
“Well you said hi, now do your bass checks,” lectured Kelsi.
“Never mind Kelsi,” said Ayashi. “Maybe if we do a couple more private parties like this we can just get roadies to do this for us.”
“Now
that’s what I like to hear,” I said as I plugged my bass into the
awaiting amp and gave it a quick strum. “Some positive thinking.”
That positive thinking carried us well though our first set without a hitch. We played some favorites like Learn to Fly and When You Were Young, and a few new songs like Weezer’s Say it ain’t So and All American Rejects’ Move Along. The crowd seemed to equally like the new along with the old, so it was so far so good. And then game time to start the second set, and Ayashi choose to do something a bit unexpected.
“So how’s everyone doing tonight?” asked Ayashi. Ok that was expected, it’s this up coming part that was unexpected. “So far we’ve played pretty much what we’ve wanted, so now’s the time to ask you guys what you’d like to hear?” The crowd went silent for a second, but it was momentarily broken by a few people calling out, Freebird! Those people were ignored. Then Jim all the way in the back of the room called out, “Test your theory!” which was soon seconded and thirded by Alyssa and Megan, then the three of them began to say in a low chant, “Test your theory, test your theory.” And the crowd, being a crowd after all began to chant along even though they had no idea what it meant, and truthfully neither did my band mates.
“What do they want us to play?” asked Ayashi covering the mike.
“They want us to test my theory,” I began to explain to them. “You know.”
“Not your everyone likes Journey theory again,” complained Kelsi. “Open Arms has to be the most sappy self absorbed example of wuss rock ever written.”
“And I’ve already conceded that point,” I said agreeing with Kelsi for a change. “But Open Arms aside Journey rocks and you know it.”
“Yeah you’re right,” replied Kelsi.
“So what are we going to play then, Wheel in the Sky, Anyway You Want It?” asked Saviris. “The crowd is getting restless.”
“I was thinking Don’t Stop Believing, actually,” I admitted.
“We can’t play that song, who’s going to play the piano part?” Kelsi said as if she was cued to.
“Don’t worry about that, I can play it on my bass,” I said reassuringly.
“Yeah, that’ll work,” said Ayashi. “Let’s give it a try.”
“Whatever,”
said Kelsi, not fully convinced. “It’s a long intro, so don’t
mess it up.”
With our minds made up, for the most part at least Ayashi took up her mike again and called out to the crowd, “So Ryle here has this little theory. He thinks that everyone here likes this next band whether they’re aware of it or not. So let’s give him the benefit of the doubt and test it out.” Jim, Alyssa and Megan then led the crown in a round of cheers and as they noise died down I took up my bass and began what would be my first true bass solo. For first time since I started playing in a band it was just me up on stage. For once everyone else was sitting there waiting for their cues. It was awesome, that is it was awesome until Kelsi got a bit too impatient waiting the minute and twenty seconds before the drums actually begin.
It’s at this point in the story I should lay out a few truths for you peoples. We’re a cover band, people come to hear us play other people’s songs, and even though we rock out loud we don’t rock enough to give us free reign over how we play any given song. If we begin to mess up a song, or stray from how it should be performed the crowd’s going to let us know it, and as Kelsi’s unnecessary eighty second drum solo drowned over one of rocks best piano sections, in this situation now a bass beat, I could sense the crowd beginning to turn. Then to make thing worse Kelsi’s unneeded drum solo, fucked up Saviris and Ayashi’s timing seeing that their cues were supposed to come from my drowned out bass beat, and as the vocal and guitar parts came late and a little messed up the crowd continued to turn. I could hear boos coming from the audience, I scanned the room and saw Jim in the back shaking his head while Alyssa and Megan shot me two confused worried looks.
“Kelsi,
come on, play the damn song properly.” I called out to her, trying
my best to be the lone member of the band playing their actual part
correctly. But my words were too little too late, and to make matters
worse Kelsi became so engrossed in her Open Arms level self absorbed
drum solo that when the minute twenty mark came and went she wasn’t
even playing her part correctly. That was the last straw. The crowd
had grown tired with our display and boos quickly drowned over even
Kelsi’s playing. It was clear that they have had enough when suddenly
the power to the stage was cut and the manager came out and pulled us
off stage.
* * *
“What the fuck Kelsi!” I shouted furiously inside the mostly empty barroom. All the guests had left, besides for the fracturing band only a few barflies and the Jim and the special hired help remained.
“What, the song needed more drums,” Kelsi mockingly replied, fully believing within her delusionious ego that she was in no way at fault.
“No, what it needed was for us to just play the song the way it was written,” I protested.
“Then shouldn’t we have had a piano?” asked Saviris.
“Shut the fuck up Saviris,” I said with misplaced rage. My words came out a bit too quickly and harshly, I wasn’t really mad at her. I then turned my anger back at it’s rightful recipient. “You just needed to sit your impatient little ass down and wait for your part to start like someone who isn’t a complete fucking little prick!”
“Whoa, calm down Ryle,” said Ayashi.
“No, I won’t just calm down, I’m getting sick of this. We’re Valefor, not Kickass Kelsi and her traveling drum show.”
“Is it too late to change our name?” asked Kelsi.
“My God, can’t you tell that I’m actually pissed off this time?” I honestly asked Kelsi. “Do you know how many songs we play that start with drums, or the guitar?” I paused to see if any one would answer, there was none. “A lot!” I added angrily. “Do you know how many songs we play that start out with the just the bass?”
“Two?” answered Saviris.
“None! Zero! And even if we did, little miss priss over here would just to play a solo over the top of it anyway.”
“I guess you were wrong about your theory,” whispered Kelsi.
“What did you just say?” I asked.
“Nothing,” responded Kelsi.
“No you said something, now say it.”
“I said, I guess you were wrong about your theory about everyone liking Journey.”
“Because we didn’t play Journey! We didn’t even have a chance to play because we got booed off the stage thanks to your fucking unnecessary drumming!”
“Whatever, it was a stupid idea anyway, playing the opening with a bass instead of a piano would have never worked,” replied Kelsi.
“You never gave it a chance to work! And even if we had someone playing the piano you’d have just played over them instead of me.”
“Yeah, probably,” answered Kelsi nonchalantly.
“That’s it, I can’t take this anymore!” I exclaimed. “I’m sick of your ego,” he said to Kelsi. “I’m sick of you never even attempting to get better,” he told Saviris. “And I’m sick of you never singing like you mean it,” he told Ayashi.
“So what are you tell us then?” asked Ayashi.
“In simple terms,” I started while pointing my finger at Ayashi. “Fuck you.” I then pointed at Saviris. “Fuck you.” I pointed at Jim, casually cleaning the glasses, trying not to get involved. “You’re cool.” Finally I turned and pointed at Kelsi and said, “And especially you. Fuck you, I quit.” I then grabbed my bass and made my way to the door, never once looking back.