A
few days had passed since I met with Sarah and my master plan was coming
to fruition. My plan was a bit convoluted and mostly revenge driven,
like most good plans are, but Sarah thought it would be fun if it worked
out, so we began the enact operation: Get Us a Guitarist. Right now
it’s two in the afternoon and Sarah and I are standing outside Brookline
High School waiting for Diane to get out of class. I had meet Diane
the other day, and Sarah was right, I didn’t know who she was, but
she apparently knew me. I’m so bad with faces, and speaking of faces
she looks just like her sister, just a bit smaller in stature, like
she was an improper clone or something. She wasn’t one for words but
she was nice enough, and thankfully she could play the drums, not as
good as Kelsi mind you, but at least she played what she was supposed
to, but I digress. The reason we were waiting outside the school was
because it was Tuesday and as soon as classes got out the three of us
are going down to the Beantown Buzz offices to see one Mr. Billy Bluejeans.
We were going have an interview, but not the one Billy was planning
on. We were going to interview him, and see if he’d be interested
in being out guitarist.
The clock hit quarter after two and the school bell rang signaling the end of the day. The doors opened and a wave of humanity poured out, when the particular member of that wave we were awaiting came out Sarah waved over to her and she ran towards were we were waiting. Wow that’s a lot of w sounds in a row, I didn’t even plan that, just sort of happened, but again I digress.
“There you are Lil’ D,” I said as Diane came to a stop in front of us.
“Ready to go?” Sarah asked her sister, who only responded with a nod.
“Alright
then let’s go,” I said as I began to lead the way to the nearest
T station. We hopped on the green line heading into the heart of the
city and hopefully towards a new guitarist.
“This is the place,” I said as we looked up a large office building that probably housed a dozen or so organizations. We entered the building and found a directory next to the elevators listing all the companies in the building.
“Here we are, Beantown Buzz,” said Sarah. “Floor eighteen suite six.”
“Sweet,” added Diane as she pressed the button for the elevator. When the doors opened up on the eighteenth floor we navigated the maze like halls and found suite six. It was a relatively small office, but than again it was a relatively small publication. The first thing we saw was a tall desk with the receptionist sitting behind it.
“Can I help you three?” asked the receptionist.
“We’re here to see Billy Bluejeans,” I told her.
“Do you have an appointment?” she asked.
“Not, exactly,” I said truthfully. “But he knows who I am.”
“And you are?”
“Just tell him Ryle’s here to see him.”
“Fine, said the receptionist, who then picked up a phone and punched in an extension and said, “A Mr. Ryle and two young ladies are here to see you Billy.” Then a black pompadoured head rose from a group of cubicles on the far side of the office. I waved and he receded back into his cube.
“He’s okay?” asked the receptionist. “Alright then.” She then hung up the phone and said, “You can meet with him in conference room two, over there,” she told us pointing at the open room. We made our way to the door, but not before Sarah had a chance to thank the receptionist. When we got to the conference room the girls sat down at the far end of the table that had a few copies of the Buzz on it along with a few other music related periodicals. I took a seat at the other end of the table near the door, I was the one Billy was expecting after all. I moment later I saw him walking towards the door.
“Ryle and two young ladies are here to see me,” repeated Billy from the doorway. “I was hoping for three, but you know what Meatloaf said, ‘Two out of three ain’t bad.’” He then walked completely in the room and saw that the two young ladies weren’t either of the three he was thinking of. “Oh I’m sorry, I don’t believe we’ve ever met.”
“Cor blimey, he’s a limey,” said Diane in response to hearing Billy talk for the first time.
“Indeed I am,” he said with a smile. “Billy Bluejeans at your service, and who may I ask are these two enchanting ladies?”
“I’m Sarah MacKenzie, and this is my sister Diane,” introduced Sarah.
“Pleased to meet you,” said, Diane.
“Likewise,” added Billy.
“They’re my new band,” I explained to Billy.
“New band, already? Boy you move fast. Trying to make Kelsi jealous eh?”
“It wasn’t like that,” both Sarah and I said. I then paused, wondering for a second why she said it too.”
“Nice harmony,” said Billy, breaking the silence.
“I’m just following some advice I got recently,” I said alluding to his last article.
“I see,” responded Billy. “I suppose the break up is official then, so what can I do for you today?”
“Well,” I started. “Like I said, this is my new band. I’ll be playing bass again.”
“I don’t see why you wouldn’t,” said Billy. “Don’t fix something that isn’t broken.”
“Exactly,” I said in agreement. “Sarah here is going to be our singer and Diane’s going to be the drummer, but we don’t have a guitarist yet.”
“Ah, okay then,” said Billy. “I think I see what you getting at.”
“That’s good,” replied Sarah.
“You want me to write an article saying that Valefor has officially broken up while also announcing the formation of you new band and that you’re looking for a guitarist.”
“Not quite,” I said. I then looked though the pile of magazines and picked up a particular issue, knowing that it contained an article that would be integral to my argument. “Do you remember the article you wrote in the October 15th issue about Valefor?”
“Yeah, that was the article about your performance at the Establishment,” said Billy. “What about it.”
“Well,” I said looking for the particular part of the article I wanted. “You said, and I quote, ‘Not to be overly harsh, but I myself could easily fill Saviris’ position in the line up any night and bring the house down.’ End quote.”
“Oh now I see where you’re going,” said Billy.
“So,” I began. “How’d you like to have a chance to back that up?”
“Well you see,” stammered Billy. “I just graduated with a degree in journalism, and I’d like to write for Rolling Stone some day, so I’m not really looking into joining a band right now.”
“Oh I see,” I said fully beginning to enact plan B. I may not have gone to college, but I still knew a little thing or two about reverse psychology. “Hmm, I guess Kelsi was right, oh well. Come one girls let’s go then,” I said getting up from my chair. “No guitarists here.”
“Thank you for your time,” Sarah said as she got up from her chair.
“While a minute, said Billy getting up from his chair as well. “What exactly did Kelsi say?”
“Oh, nothing,” I said. “Just that you’re mostly a blowhard critic that in no way can back up what he says and has no right to report about it.”
“That’s pretty much what she said to me over the phone that day when I tried to get an interview,” admitted Billy. “She also told me to go fuck off.”
“And wouldn’t you like to prove her wrong?” I asked.
“Yes,” Billy admitted again.
“And you said you weren’t that busy down here,” I added.
“I did,” said Billy.
“And didn’t you also say that I could come down at any time, even if all I wanted was to jam a little,” I said adding what I hoped would be the final nail into the coffin.
“I did say that,” sighed Billy. “I think we’re striding towards a conclusion here.”
“All we ask is that you come over and play a little,” said Sarah.
“Test the waters out a little,” added Diane.
“Well far be it from me to deny to the request of two lovely ladies,” said Billy. “Alright then, you win, I concede defeat.”
“Excellent,” I said, everything was going according to plan.
“Here, you can meet up with us here, anytime this weekend,” said Sarah handing Billy a slip of paper with her address on it.
“How’s Saturday around four?” asked Billy.
“That works just fine,” replied Sarah.
“Nice
doing business with you,” I said as I reached out and shock Billy’s
hand.
“Operation: Get Us A Guitarist worked without a hitch!” I announced as we made our way back outside.
“I know,” agreed Sarah. “I may be the singer, but you certainly have a way with words Ryle.”
“That I do,” I said gracefully accepting the compliment. “But don’t thank just me, you two played your parts perfectly too.”
“Why thank you,” said Diane.
“Guy’s kind of flirty though,” I said on a different note.
“I think he was just being polite,” said Sarah. “Though he was laying it on a little thick.”
“And he’s hot too,” added Diane.
“I
think he’ll work out fine,” said Sarah. “But we’ll find out
for sure this Saturday.”
When Saturday came Sarah, Diane and I waited at the apartment, awaiting a certain Mr. Bluejeans.
“I hope he shows,” said Sarah breaking the silence.
“He better show,” added Diane anxiously sitting at her drums.
“He’ll show,” I said adamantly. “He doesn’t seem to be the kind to break his word.” Then four came and passed. Bastard didn’t show!
Another round of silence began, as Billy was now officially late, though I suppose being fashionably late was still to his character. A minute or so later a knock was heard at the door.
“That’s got to be him!” exclaimed Diane, who rushed to the door and opened it only to see a girl pulling a wagon full of boxes of cookies.
“Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?” asked the girl gleefully.
“No,” Diane said curtly, slamming the door.
“Diane Elizabeth MacKenzie!” scolded Sarah.
“What?” responded Diane. “It wasn’t him
A third round of silence came, but it didn’t last too long as another knock came about a minute later. Diane again rushed to the door but was stopped short by Sarah.
“I’ll get the door this time,” she said holding her sister back. Sarah then opened the door, this time revealing Billy holding a guitar case in one hand, and a box of thin mints in the other.
“Well
hello ladies,” greeted Billy. “Care for a biscuit?”
“Nice place you have here,” said Billy as Sarah handed him a small glass of milk.
“Thank you,” responded Sarah.
“I especially like those posters you got hanging up there,” added Billy. “Great albums.”
“Everyone around here seems to think so,” I said.
“So,” said Billy looking around the place, seeing Diane seated behind her drums yet again, with my bass plugged into my amp. “I suppose we might as well get this over with,” he said opening his case, carefully taking out a Fender Stratocaster.
“Ah, I see you’re a Fender man too,” I said upon seeing Billy’s fine axe.
“Born and raised,” replied Billy. “Where can I plug in?”
“Right over here,” I said patting the amp.
“So,” started Billy. “What should we play?”
“Why don’t you play what you want, and we’ll follow along,” I suggested. “We know a lot of songs.”
“Ok then,” said Billy. “Try to keep up.” He then plugged in his guitar and began to strum the opening riff that any self-respecting person who considers themselves a fan of music, can recognize by the fifth note.
“Hey, hey, hey,” I said stopping Billy. “No Stairway to Heaven,” I said jokingly.
“I
suppose you’re right. Everyone does that song, it’s been played
to death,” admitted Billy. “How about this one?” He then began
to play the simple straightforward riff that I instantly knew as the
opening riff to Jethro Tull’s Aqualung. Now while the Tull does rock,
I wouldn’t necessarily call them mainstream in any sense of the term.
I knew the song. I just hoped the girls did too. When the riff repeated
for the first time I joined in on the bass, for the most part the guitarist
and bassist play the same thing for most of the song, so synchronization
between the two performers is key. To my relief Diane played the little
drum fill that goes after the main riff ends for the second time, and
too my further relief Sarah joined in singing her part as the riff came
around for the third time. I glanced over at Billy and saw an impressed
look on his face, if only for a moment. When if came time for the guitar
solo I could see the smirky grin grow on his face. You could tell he
really enjoyed what he was doing, and I was enjoying it too, especially
when I joined in with my bass, and the entire time Diane didn’t play
a thing, because she wasn’t supposed to. It was enough to make me
cry, but, but I didn’t, cause I’m a man, a manly man.
“That … was … awesome!” exclaimed Diane at the end of the song.
“I have to say I’m impressed,” said Billy. “I knew Ryle could play, but I knew nothing about you two,” he said to the girls. “Diane, you show really good promise, and Sarah you have an incredible voice.”
“Thank you,” replied Sarah, blushing yet again. “I had fun playing with you.”
“Yes, about that,” started Billy. “I have to admit, I picked to play that song because truthfully I didn’t think you’d know it.”
“You wanted us to fail?” asked Sarah, somehow looking saddened, confused and annoyed all at the same time.
“I don’t think that was his aim,” I tried to explain. “He started to play Stairway to Heaven, but then my reference to Wayne’s World stopped him, then he said that ‘everybody plays that song.’ I think he played Aqualung to see if we were more than that. Am I right?” I asked Billy.
“Well,” started Billy. “Truthfully I played that song because I thought you’d all fail at it, and then I could go home.”
“Oh,” I said, now sharing Sarah’s combination of sadness, confusion and annoyance, mostly annoyance for me though. “That was kind of a dick move.”
“Pure douche baggery,” added Diane, who seemed the most disappointed with Billy.
“I know,” sighed Billy. “When we tell the people about this later on let’s use Ryle’s version of the story.”
“Well, Ryle’s version paints a better picture,” replied Sarah, who then stopped herself mid sentence, fully comprehending what Billy had said. “Wait, are you saying you’d like to join the band?”
“I guess I am,” said Billy. “Besides, Ryle was right, I’m not that busy at work, so what the hell, let’s see how far the crazy train goes.”
“All right!” exclaimed Diane, having all her former disappointment replaced with awesomeness. “So where do we go from here?”
“Well,” I said, thinking out loud again. “It was around this point last time that we all picked stage names.”
“Oh yeah, let’s do that,” agreed Diane.
“Okay, well see no reason to not continue using Ryle,” I said. “What about you Lil’ D?”
“I was thinking about going with Lil’ D,” she said with a grin.
“Yeah, that makes sense,” I said. “Also that way we can just say the D stands for drummer too.”
“Exactly,” agreed Lil’ D, who then added, “Billy, you should totally use your pen name. Billy Bluejeans, how can you get more awesome sounding than that?”
“What pen name?” asked Billy. “Bluejeans is my real last name.”
“It is?” the three of us all said in astonishment.
“I thought Billy Bluejeans was an alias you started using when you started writing,” I said.
“Nope, it’s my real name,” Billy said with an ear-to-ear grin. “Well actually that’s not true. Back in Shrubshire where I’m from my family was known as the Bluepantaloons, but my grandfather changed it to Bluejeans in the fifties to sound more modern.”
“Okay,” said Sarah, still a bit bewildered. “I guess that makes sense.”
“But Lil’ D’s point still remains valid, it is a pretty awesome name,” I admitted. “Just don’t get an ego over it.”
“I promise,” Billy said with his left hand raised while covering his hear with his right. He then winked and added, “I know what you mean.”
“So that leaves just you then sis,” said Lil’ D. “What are you going to go with?”
“Well,” started Sarah. “Ryle once told me that as the lead singer I’d need to have a strong powerful voice to draw people in, like a siren. So I think that’s what I’m going with, Siren.”
“Good choice,” said Billy. “However it seems we’re still missing one last thing, probably the most important thing.”
“And that would be?” asked Lil’ D.
“A band name of course,” said Billy.
“Yeah, you have a point there,” I said. “We haven’t thought about that.” I then begin thinking about a band name, truthfully I don’t know who actually came up with Valefor. It wasn’t me. I think it was Kelsi, or maybe Ayashi, but I was getting off topic. I then looked up at Siren’s two posters and was inspired yet again. “I think I got an idea,” I said. I then pointed at the two posters. “Bleve 186.”
“That’s a bit, different,” Billy said trying not to laugh.
“No come on, think about it,” I said. “We all like both bands, and we are going to be a cover band, at least for now. Plus it’s clever and witty.”
“He does make a good argument,” admitted Billy.
“And it does have a certain ring to it,” added Siren.
“I know I got nothing better,” said Lil’ D.
“So Bleve 186 it is?” I asked.
“Bleve 186 it is,” they all said together.